My Pants Fit Loosely Now

Well the diet is definitely working, because when I put on my jeans for the first time in a couple of weeks they fit loosely. So loosely, in fact, that my belt on the last notch was still too loose.

And I feel healthier, too. I'm jazzed about losing the fat that remains between me and my goal weight.

The past twenty years have been interesting, to say the least. You hear about the prejudice against fat people, and fat people believe they know better than anyone just how deep this goes. But they don't; the people who know the depths of this prejudice better than anyone are the people like me who were once physically fit, but who gained a lot of weight over a long period of time. That's because we have fully experienced both the benchmark of being reasonably attractive to others and the benchmark of being treated with everything from offhandedness to open hostility. People who have always been fat know only the misery of being fat, and can only imagine what it's like "on the inside" to be accepted both physically and intellectually the minute you walk into a room. Basically, it sucks a lot worse than the prepetually fat can possibly imagine.

You know how rich people blow their brains out when they aren't rich anymore because they just can't imagine living outside the realm of privilege and entitlement, but people who have always been poor just deal? Same thing.

It was the same thing when I went from living in a luxury penthouse in Midtown Atlanta to living in a low-rent apartment when I was in my early twenties. When I lived in a swanky penthouse and ran my own business (back in the days of my first business) I could throw a pebble and hit an uncharacteristically hot date who was, shall we say, "enthusiastic." And that was as a single parent with full custody of a very young child. When I was just another schmuck working just another job, I couldn't get laid outside a women's prison with a handful of weekend passes and a case of Jack Daniels.

We're all nothing more than appearances. Nothing more than the interpretations of people who ignore what is real in favor of a facade that should be meaningless in an intellect-based society. But there is something much stronger than intellect working here, and none of us can effectively argue with it. That all-powerful thing is instinct. Instinct built into our brains by millenia of conditioning that tells us who are the most powerful mates, leaders, and enemies in our midst.

Women want to mate with young, tall, visibly strong men with clear eyes and symmetrical features. These are the men who most logically can protect them and father healthy children. And they require men of visible means to support them and the children that might issue from their union.

Men might criticize women for this, but we shouldn't. This is entirely logical behavior. I actually quite respect them for this -- especially the women who are unapologetic for strictly adhering to their criteria. And besides, men are much worse in the ways they choose the most desireable women, which seem to have almost no direct biological value whatsoever.

The stereotype of "fat and stupid" really can't be argued with too much, really. It was stupid to allow myself to get this way. Gluttony and the lack of control over my immediate personal gratification. More was always better.

Unless you have a scientifically diagnosed condition that is separately verified and certified by a competent medical authority (and no, that isn't you or me; there are only a couple of handfuls nationwide), then you have full control over your ability to lose weight. It doesn't matter if your family is all fat, or if you're a Pima Indian (the most efficient metabolism of any ethnicity in the world), or fill-in-the-blank, it's all up to you. Deal.

The reactions of others can be forgiven if we understand the science behind the reasons why they act the way they do.

My fat is my problem.

But not for long.

KBO!